What You Don't Own- Owns You

Does it ever seem like some unseen/ often unknown force is driving you down the path of your life and you have little to no control over it's influence? How many ways can you answer yes to that?

I think I know that there is much that is external to me that I cannot control, and have seemingly less than no influence over. I also know that Science is beginning to prove that the beat of a butterfly's wings in Brazil has an effect on events a half world away, so my inability to directly observe the effects of my conduct in any given circumstance does not eliminate either the impact of that behavior, nor my responsibility. "Mitake-Oyasin" - Everything is Related.

For the moment, however, I am writing about a landscape closer to home, namely the internal landscape. I am addressing that phenomenon of the internal drive that seems to be beyond our personal awareness, and yet we feel it pushing us into behaviors and patterns of thought or action with consequences both seemingly harmless and harmful.

How the hell does that happen?

Here is what I have found so far.

I have been saturated with ideas and input from a time prior to even being able to assign language and concepts to this input. I may have even brought some along some ideas and concepts with me when I was born, if you can relate to that whole "karma/continuum of Spirit-Energy" sort of thing.

The reactions I have observed, exhibited, and experienced with respect to all those ideas and concepts have provoked within me behaviors that at the time seemed like the best path to fulfillment of some basic hierarchy of needs stuff, like safety, acceptance, and identity.

Then, I kept repeating those behaviors. I did this for so long, and so often, that they became what I call "quasi-autonomic" - meaning they seemed like they were just always there, like breathing.

"That's just how I'm wired". "I've always been that way". Nice escape routes, but quite possibly just blatant self justification, especially if harm was involved.

Enough of this behavior piles up and it's suddenly like your life has gotten away from you and there you stand amidst the wreckage, a victim of your own sleepwalking.

Good News. Once you see this, you can own it. These "quasi-autonomic" responses are just that...quasi. They can be called out for what they are, and they can yield the floor of your Life to new behaviors that clear away the wreckage. You have to own this stuff though, or it owns you.
So start digging. Get a helper if you need it in the form of a therapist, or a spiritual mentor, or a trusted guide who has owned their own Life.  It's often hard to spot these kind of things without an outside perspective.

It may be childhood wounds, that's a common incubation point for all those "quasi-autonomic" reactions. It may be other things collected along the trail so far, however far back you think that trail may have originated.

None of that matters. All that matters is the freedom and healing that comes from owning who you are and how you got here. It's not "about" whose fault it is. It's "about" ownership, reclamation, restitution where harm has been done, and forgiveness where harm has been visited upon you.

Own Your Journey.

Then, when the Butterfly that is the authentic you beats it's wings, halfway around the world another Spirit will hear the call to healing.

Walk In Beauty.
WES
(Written on a plane flight from Denver to Austin on 5/31/13)